1. |
Disposable
03:24
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Get wasted and stumble in to my car.
Stay silent, I already know what you are
Said, “I’m not drunk” at the top of your lungs.
Be patient—steady biting my tongue
“I’m not drunk”
Scream at the top of your lungs
I’m tired of being disposable
Someone you gave up on
And, at least I tried more and more each time
Took some steps inside to help you ease your mind
But, you’ve been stuck on the outside.
And I held an umbrella ‘til the weather got better
But, the rain soaked through my shoes.
Just as long as it didn’t get on you.
Said, “I’m not drunk” at the top of your lungs.
Be patient—steady biting my tongue
“I’m not drunk”
Scream at the top of your lungs
I’m tired of being disposable.
Someone you gave up on.
I’m tired of being disposable
(You never saw how hard I tried)
I’m tired of being disposable
(All night, unwind)
And I am afraid of mistakes I’ve made will take me to my grave
I’m tired of being disposable.
You told me that I was uptight
You’re someone I couldn’t trust
But, now you’re falling on the floor
I’m over chasing you
I can’t change your mind
Whisper to the tile that you’ll be just fine.
I’m tired of being disposable
(You never saw how hard I tried)
I’m tired of being disposable
(All night, unwind)
And I am afraid of mistakes I’ve made will take me to my grave
I’m tired of being disposable.
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2. |
Circles
03:16
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Your roots comes crawling down.
They sift inside for just a spot left in the ground.
But, the hole you left is much more vacant now.
What will it take for this to pacify?
Because the walls are closing in.
I’m spinning circles in my head again.
‘Cause I still feel you in my breath.
In this ghost that you’ve left
And, in these half lit cigarettes
But, I still linger in your absence
and the distance that you’ve kept.
I’m still counting ever step.
(I need a way out)
Now I’ve been stuck inside for days
In routines I cannot change
It’s another example of love that you could not reciprocate
What will it take for this to pacify?
Because the walls are closing in
I’m spinning circles in my head again
What will it take for this to pacify?
What will it take for this...
Dive into you
It’s all beneath the skin
Dive into you
Cause I can feel you crawling in
What will it take for this to pacify?
Because the walls are closing in
I’m spinning circles in my head again
What will it take for this to pacify?
What will it take for this...
I’m spinning circles
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3. |
35
03:24
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I’m not sure
If I’ll see 35
Until what’s left inside of me
Starts to subside
I don’t want you to know
Of the grief that I found
Or how many times in a day
I’m living in the ground.
Lost and found.
Started smoking again
Just to feel the burn (the burn)
(And I’ve been coughing up blood)
I guess I’ll never learn
I’ve been counting bottles
In the back of my room
Spilling over again
I’ve been counting voices
In the back of my head
Telling me to “calm down”
3 A.M. instead
All the trees were dead
But, I still crashed my car in the woods again
Settle into friends
Try to make amends
Using words I tried to keep in
(Using words I tried to keep in)
I don’t know want you to know
Of the grief that I found
Or how many times in the day
I’m living in the ground.
Lost and found.
Started smoking again
Just to feel the burn (the burn)
(And I’ve been coughing up blood)
I guess I’ll never learn
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4. |
Undone
03:20
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Your voice echoes in this empty space.
These sheets lay still falling in and out of place.
Talking to your ghost
For you to come home
(I want you to know)
All I’ll ever be
Is a vacant spot
Inside your head
(More than you are now)
Now my head is numb
My head is numb.
I’m undone.
I’ve been caught in your stare. (Let me go)
Choke on words that you said. (Let me breathe)
Suffocating again. (I can't go)
Suffocating again.
And you know I'm nothing.
I know I’m always late
No words for me to say
I’ll sleep away the days
‘Til I can see you again
I can’t forget your face.
It’s like ice inside my veins
And you’ve been gone for so long
But, I’m still stuck inside your
Oh, your old ways
Tying me down
I’m not alright
With your insight
Talking to your ghost
For you to come home
(I want you to know)
All I’ll ever be
Is a vacant spot
Inside your head
(More than you are now)
Now my head is numb
My head is numb.
I’m undone.
I’ve been caught in your stare. (Let me go)
Choke on words that you said. (Let me breathe)
Suffocating again. (I can't go)
Suffocating again.
And you know I'm nothing.
And I know it's not your fault.
All I’ll ever be
Is a vacant spot
Inside your head
(More than you are now)
Now my head is numb
My head is numb.
I’m undone.
I’ve been caught in your stare. (Let me go)
Choke on words that you said. (Let me breathe)
Suffocating again. (I can't go)
Suffocating again.
And you know I'm nothing.
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5. |
Mourn
03:24
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“So what?”
Is this you finally giving up?
Like when you’d come home drunk
And act like you’re not in the wrong
Settle on a different face
Finding any other way
To cope with all of this, all of this
(I’m long gone)
I’m not a loss or someone you need to mourn.
(Stay inside)
Drown in your flaws; too gone to push off your floor
I’ve been biting my tongue
To lessen all the lies that I’ve been piling up inside my gums
Deflect the blame
I’ll do the same
All you do is run away
All you do is run away
(I’m long gone)
I’m not a loss or someone you need to mourn.
(Stay inside)
Drown in your flaws; too gone to push off your floor
You lied and I
Don’t know why you say you’re fine
(I’ve been patiently waiting for you to come home safe)
(I’m long gone)
I’m not a loss or someone you need to mourn.
I’ve been biting my tongue
Drown in your flaws; too gone to push off your floor
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Cloverdale Bellmawr, New Jersey
Six piece alternative band based out of the South Jersey/Philadelphia area.
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